part 2

and so the adventure began. vladimir was very excited. he learned the girls name was anastasia. she was very cute and he was glad they were going on an adventure. it would be filled with peril because honey badgers are very dangerous sneaky creatures, but he didnt care. they started off. they had been walking for about a hundred years when they came upon a shiny man sitting on the side of the road. he looked very normal except that he was shiny. he was crying. "whats wrong" said anastasia. the shiny man said "im a robot, but i was born with a heart and i dont understand my place in the world." "well i know your place in the world." said vlad. "its probably chasing after a sneaky honey badger with us." so the three were off, anastasia, vladimir, and mohommad....

part 1

so one day this kid named vladimir was sitting at home and he was like, its really hot in here. so he left. he went on a walk and stopped at this pancake house. it wasnt ihop, ihops for yuppies, but it was this really awesome pancake house that had free wifi. one that served waffles. kinda like waffle house, but it wasnt full of prostitutes and crack addicts. ANYWAYS, he went in there and there was this waitress that was super awesome and he could totally tell that she had a bitchin' daughter. he talked her up and she recommended the blueberry waffles with lots of bacon. well, she brought him his plate and there was steam rising from it 'cause it was totally hot and fresh and he was like, mmmmm, but THEN this honey badger came out of no where. he was like what the fuck? and the waitress was like what the FUCK, and the honey badger took the plate of awesome blueberry waffles and bacon and ran off. well, vladimir just wouldnt stand for this. he grabbed the waitress and said "ma'am, would you like to go on an adventure?" she was like, "no. i have a mexican douche of a boyfriend at home and he would never let me. HOWEVER, i have a bangin' daughter sitting right outside that im sure would love to go." "very well," said vladimir. he went outside to get her, but first he left a huge tip because hes just nice like that. he saw this girl with orange hair sitting listening to lucy in the sky with diamonds. he was like "HEY, are you that hot waitress' daughter?" and she was like, fuck yeah i am, lets get this adventure going.